This could make things very interesting. Across much of the country, disciplenary actions against parents and coaches are often handled at the local league level, with state sports associations handling disputes that can’t be resolved. Here in North Carolina, soccer leagues under the USYSA/NCYSA umbrella have to conform to a detailed process, allowing for local resolution of issues, but also allowing for state involvement and appeals. But that’s not the case across all states and sports. You read news items all the time about out of control coaches and parents that leagues try to ignore until it turns into a criminal matter.
Fed up with complaints, Rhode Island is considering the formation of a state council to settle youth sports disputes, with the ability to fine parents, coaches, etc.
A bill pending in Rhode Island would create a seven-member council to settle disputes in youth recreational leagues, with the power to fine parents or others it thinks are in the wrong. Backers say it would create a more systematic way for resolving sports fights that sometimes result in children or parents arbitrarily being removed from organized leagues. While some other state and town governments have tried to enforce good sportsmanship, national experts say no state has ever considered intervening so deeply in sideline squabbles.
Limited to issues of improper behavior by parents and coaches, it could help with leagues that don’t have state or national oversight. But the devil is in the details and unintended consequences. Consider this justification from the author of the bill being considered, State Senator John Tassoni Jr:
Tassoni wrote the legislation after hearing from parents, including the mother of a young girl cut from a football cheerleading squad because her mother argued with a coach. “The board of directors said, ‘You’re out. Take your kid and leave,'” Tassoni said. “Who loses? The child loses because they can’t play sports with their friends.”
WOW! So what he is saying is parents would have the ability to appeal team selection decisions to a state board? Does he have any idea what kind of nightmare scenario that would be for sports leagues? You’d have entire teams held up from competing because a parent of a child who was cut is appealing to this board. Clearly this is not a well thought out idea. What about leagues with established discipline and appeals processes and codes of conduct? Will this board overrule those?
I like the noble intent of providing a structure to encourage good behavior by parents and coaches in leagues with no formal codes of conduct and D&A procedures, but the flip side of being able to second guess league decisions is alarming.
Stay tuned – this could make things very interesting in youth sports.
March 4th, 2009 at 11:35 am
This was my first year coaching U10 girls. Everything would have been great if none parents were involved…or at least a few specific parents.
I’m still debating weather or not I’ll coach my girls again this year.
March 4th, 2009 at 1:57 pm
That’s rough. I’ve seen teams absolutely torn apart by feuding parents. But in the end the coach has to try and mend the fences. I’ve been very lucky with the parents on my teams and know it’s only a matter of time before I end up with a troublesome one.
I’ve found communication and setting clear expectations up front are key. They may not be happy, but it will keep some parents muffled enough to avoid collateral damage. But sometimes you have to be assertive and explain that disruptions from the sideline only hurt the team. At some point it may be necessary to pull in a Director of Coaching or other league official to help.
Good Luck! Would hate to see disruptive parents deny your kids of a coach!
March 4th, 2009 at 6:48 pm
Eric, I agree with Mike, don’t give up b/c of a few jerk parents, esp. if you enjoy it and one of the girls you coach is your daughter. She’ll be gone before you know it so enjoy the time now, esp. on the pitch seeing her play. Good luck.
March 4th, 2009 at 7:53 pm
here’s the kicker…no pun intended…most undermining parent was my assistant coach. needless to say he lasted about 2 games.
when I talked to the U10 director, she was aware of this guy and his ability to make things…let’s just say…complicated.
The long and short of it is that I will probably coach my daughters’ team one more year (U10) and pick my son up in U8 next year. I don’t have the desire to do both in the same season.
March 4th, 2009 at 8:07 pm
Coaching two teams certainly can be done, but it’s not easy. It’s tough when an assistant causes trouble because they resent when you tell them “It’s just not working out”, but at least your director knew the situation and person.
I’ll say this, U10 is a lot of fun. I enjoyed U8, but have really enjoyed coaching 6v6/8v8 because it’s an age where kids start to ‘get it’
Good luck and keep us posted!