Let’s start this off with a hypothetical scenario. Your child’s team is playing a team from a nearby town in a closely contested match. The score is 1-0 in favor of your team. Late in the 2nd half, one of your team’s players, let’s call them Player A, goes in hard for the ball and gets called for an elbow/push. The opponent, let’s call them Player B doesn’t fall down or get seriously hurt – it was just a rough foul.
Suddenly the father of Player B comes onto the field and starts yelling at Player A over the foul. Almost immediately, the mother of Player A comes onto the field, worried about her daughter, and starts yelling at the father of Player B. Player A’s father comes out onto the field as well. At that instant, most of the parents swarm the pitch attempting to get their children off the field. Meanwhile, the coaches and referees are struggling, but succeeding, in pulling the initial parents of Players A and B apart. Not long after that, three police cars pull up and officers get out to restore order as parents are all over the field. The game is halted at that point.
What should be done? Which parents should be punished and how? Should team sanctions apply?
I ask this because this very scenario recently played out with my daughter’s peewee basketball team (they’re mostly 8-9 year olds) The foul happened between the biggest players on each team who were battling in the paint for the ball with their arms up. When they brought their arms down, they hit each other in the face and the referee called a foul on our team. The injury was not major – the players both were still standing up and were OK. But the sequence of events resulting in the parents swarming the court happened as described above and when the police arrived at the gym, there were parents all over the court.
This just goes to show you that crazy parents aren’t limited to soccer. This was Recreational Basketball for 8-9 year old girls! The interesting thing is while we don’t know for sure yet, the coaches expect the county athletic department to suspend both teams from play for the rest of the season because so many parents entered the court. It is unclear if either of the original two parents will be individually sanctioned in any way. But I find it interesting that the county would punish the girls, who only want to play, because a couple parents did something they shouldn’t have done. You’d think those parents would be dealt with. Team sanctions exist in soccer as well, but in most rules I’ve seen, there has to be something pretty egregious for the team to be sanctioned as a whole vs individual players or parents. But the view is that the parents should never have entered the court to retrieve their kids and since so many did, team sanctions are called for.
Now this wasn’t some bleacher clearing brawl, though things were tense. The sanctity of the soccer pitch is the same – you don’t come on the field unless you are summoned by the referee. But if two parents suddenly came on the field and looked ready to fight, would you wait to be summoned or go get your child, even if it meant breaking the ‘never step foot on the pitch’ rule. It is an interesting situation. Clearly the parent of Player B was wrong to come onto the court and yell at an opposing player. Player A’s parents were wrong too as they likely inflamed things, though they were concerned about their daughter’s safety. As for the rest of the crowd – it’s an interesting debate as to what they should be expected to do.
So faced with a similar situation as a parent, coach, and/or league administrator at one of your U10 Rec soccer matches – what would you do? Who would you sanction and why? As a parent, would you have come onto the pitch to get your child?
February 12th, 2008 at 10:35 pm
I agree about not punishing the girls. But, the parents would get the whole book. Parent B banned from games for complete season. Parent A banned from games for complete season.
February 12th, 2008 at 10:48 pm
I definitely agree about banning Parent B for a season. But I wonder if Parent A would deserve some consideration, perhaps a couple game suspension vs an entire season, primarily because they came onto the pitch out of concern for their daughter.
I’m a league officer and I can’t say I’d stay on the sideline if some random male adult ran out onto the field and started angrily yelling at my 8 year old daughter. I don’t know if I’d just stand there waiting for the referee and/or coach to do something or not.
February 12th, 2008 at 11:41 pm
I agree with both previous comments.Kids should not be punished for bone headed parents.
You never can say exactly what you would do given a heated situation like that. It depends on so many things, proximity of the players to the bickering parents, demeanor of the officials and coaches, etc. And some parents are more protective than others. But officials do have control over the field and they should be allowed to do their job.That being said, they should have police backup to assist. I am amazed that there is not at least one officer at every event site.The presence of a police officer goes a long way in keeping order.
February 13th, 2008 at 6:00 pm
Just remember, it always starts with the moms. Then the dads have to get involved to defend their wives. Then one of the moms starts screaming at the other dad to leave her husband alone, then the other mom says, “don’t talk to my husband that way,” then one of the moms yells, “just smack him honey,” the response to which is probably, “I outta smack you.” Etc., etc., etc. Get them all in a room later and hear 5 different stories about what happened, and what nice people they really are. Mention that they acted like an idiot in front of 20 children and they will say, “I was only defending (fill in the blank).
February 13th, 2008 at 6:54 pm
Heh – I sat in on a Discipline and Appeals case that unfolded almost exactly as you describe, and ended in someone getting decked.
I’ve noticed a lot of these situations come up when some parent gets upset their kid is getting fouled and tells the fouling kid’s parents to control their kid or something. Even though they may be right – that the fouling kid is a jerk – keep it to yourself. You aren’t ever going to convince a parent their kid is a jerk – you’re only going to get them upset and when it’s all said and done – you’ll all be watching from the parking lot the next weekend!
February 13th, 2008 at 7:50 pm
While kids should not be punished for the actions of the parents, it can send a pretty strong message to the parents that you are jeopardizing your child’s participation with your actions.
While it’s tough to come down hard on a parent for an instinctive defensive reaction, both parent A and parent B need to be suspended. Without the “defense” of parent A, i would hope that the referee would have removed parent B and police involvement may not have been necessary.
February 14th, 2008 at 3:44 pm
I would banish player B’s father for good, player A’s mother for rest of the season (yes, what she did was understandable, but not right). I would then call a meeting with leage officials and the 2 teams and give the parents of both teams a choice:
a) season over for both teams
b) NO parents at any games for rest of season
February 14th, 2008 at 5:14 pm
Well turns out they got no choice – they just ended the season for both teams. Unfortunate, because my daughter doesn’t understand why she and her teammates are being punished for what a parent on the other team did.
When I explained that the county was upset so many parents came on the court she asked “Well if some man came down onto the court and started yelling at me, wouldn’t you come help me?” My tortured explanation that I wasn’t allowed to and it was up to her coach and the referees to handle it wasn’t well received. I think the phrase “Well that’s stupid!” sums up her reaction 🙂
You know basketball courts are small. Soccer fields? Not so much. If some guy runs onto the field and starts yelling at my daughter (or son) near the parent side of the field, I don’t believe I’d wait for the coach or the referee to come to their aid because I have no way of knowing what their intentions are. I’d be on that field in a minute protecting my child. Any other time, even in the case of an injury – I’d absolutely stay on the sideline until summoned. But you don’t yell at or threaten my kids on the field and expect me to just stand there and watch.
I agree that the ‘parents stay off the playing surface’ is a VERY important rule. But it’s not absolute – you have to think in some rare instances it’s called for. Its just common sense.