A league in Bethesda, Maryland, has tried fining parents who misbehave at youth soccer games, but that didn’t work. They just paid it and kept yelling. So now they banished them from the sideline – forcing them to watch from 100 yards away. Many used binoculars to see the action.
The trouble began when a parent from the Springfield Youth Club’s Xplosion working as an assistant referee raised a flag in the air and called an offside violation on a Bethesda player, according to the minutes of the disciplinary hearing. After the game, a Bethesda parent approached the referee and accused him of making the wrong call, the report says. The parent “started to raise his voice,” according to the report. More sniping occurred, and “the tone and behavior of the parents was aggressive.” Then another Bethesda parent allegedly yelled at the referee’s daughter, “Your father should be fired!”
The league’s disciplinary committee ruled that the Bethesda parents had violated the league’s code of conduct — which asks parents to refrain from questioning referees’ calls — through “egregious” behavior that “has no place in youth sports.” They ruled that the parents could not be on the sidelines for the first two games of this season.
That’s good stuff. This league doesn’t mess around – they even have sportsmanship liaisons for each team. And one of the parents inadvertently showed why this method will probably work when she was interviewed:
“It’s embarrassing,” one of the parents said. “This is seventh-grade soccer.” Across the way, Potomac lawyer Philip Page watched his daughter Jacqueline play through binoculars, which was “very maddening.” Especially because he wasn’t even at the game where the unsportsmanlike conduct occurred. “We accepted our punishment, and we’re abiding by it,” Page said. “One of the functions of sports is to teach sportsmanship. When we as parents violate that, the girls need to see there are consequences to those actions.”
Emphasis mine. What other innovative ideas have you encountered with leagues trying to address poor parent (and coach) behavior?
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April 22nd, 2009 at 9:22 am
I heard about this story somewhere else, too, and I think that that the woman near the end really sums it up:
“It’s embarrassing,” one of the parents said. “This is seventh-grade soccer.”
April 22nd, 2009 at 9:39 am
We play in a similar league in the DC area that also uses a designated parent as sportsmanship liaisons. The key to using this is to pick the loudest, most troublesome, parent and give them the liaison tag and ask them to keep everyone in line. Or, sometimes even better – give it to the loudmouth’s spouse!
April 22nd, 2009 at 9:44 am
MDScot – do they have to wear a tag to the games?
April 22nd, 2009 at 6:03 pm
Yes, they have to wear badges. They are also required to go to training. I know both the boys (NCSL) and girls (WAGS) leagues require, as may the team with both boys and girls teams (ODSL).
April 23rd, 2009 at 12:03 pm
One of my son’s travel and premier coaches handled improper parent behavior by telling all the parents at the beginning of the season that he will not tolerate any behavior of this sort. If it occurs, the parent’s player will be pulled off the field and benched or not played if he is on the bench at the time of the problem. It worked…
April 23rd, 2009 at 2:57 pm
Karen, no offense to your son’s coach but it seems to me that punishing a player for the transgressions of his or her parent(s) is extremely unfair and sends the wrong message. Kids can’t control what their parents say or do.
April 24th, 2009 at 7:01 am
Coach Tim,
I totally agree with you about kids not being able to control what their parents do. It was a crazy situation but the parents knew the coach meant business and it seemed to work.
April 27th, 2009 at 1:02 pm
Parents are Modern Day Hooligans…..from my blog on subject at: http://zenfooty.com/blogs_detail.php?blogno=15&func=1819367706
There…I said it…Some parents are the new hooligans of modern youth soccer. I love you all but I feel safer at a British second division game surrounded by drunken thugs. I have a million stories. One day I saw a lady with a horse blanket over her head running out onto the field to yell at a player on the opposing team. This was at a U-13 girls game. The blanket was really ugly so you can imagine what she looked like underneath. And the things she was saying to the 12 year old were unspeakable. Can you imagine, trying to dribble a ball downfield and an ugly screaming blanket comes out at you from nowhere? Talk about a nightmare! So here is the deal: Parents get a yellow and a red just like the kids. But, with the red, the team which the hooligan supports gets a player sent off (preferably their kid), the parent gets ejected, and the club gets fined. Oh, and the blanket gets destroyed. What say you?
April 29th, 2009 at 7:23 pm
I was part of a referee crew this past weekend at a U10 recreation game and we had to eject 2 fathers for continuously harping on us for the calls we were making.
Finally, my 16-year old center stopped play and ejected both fathers from the complex and wouldn’t restart the game until the parents left the complex. Talk about a long humiliating walk.
Thankfully, our league is taking a hard stance against behavior like that.
June 9th, 2009 at 5:41 pm
As a referee, I’m absolutely for this. This kind of behavior does nothing but bring disrepute to the game, as well as embarrass the kids.
I wish we had a liaison to the teams here. That’s a great idea!
I can also tell you that more than half of referees do not return for a second year because of obnoxious parents and coaches. I’ve seen both.