Are you KIDDING me? I never cease to be amazed at what some parents will do to get their kids to be ‘better’:

A soccer mom, upset at her teenage daughter’s performance at a game Saturday, stopped along Interstate 80 and left her there.

Officer Katherine Finnell said the 42-year-old Lincoln woman was ticketed on suspicion of child neglect after the 2:30 p.m. incident.

She said the woman yelled at her 15-year-old in her car and asked her to repeat lines about improving her performance. When the girl messed up the lines, she slapped her.

Finnell said the teen told her mom to pull over along I-80 near the downtown exit, so she did. That’s when the girl says her mom yelled at her to get out. She did and her mom drove away.

The poor girl is not a robot. Do I encourage my kids to excel? Yes. Are there repercussions if they fail, say, at school? Yes, though that usually involves the loss of privileges, not abandonment on an interstate! Have I been brutally honest with my son after a match where he just didn’t play well? Rarely, though I don’t berate him, but life is not all ponies and roses. If he has a bad game I tell him so and encourage him to get past it and learn from it as well as highlighting the good points. But who in their right mind is going to discipline their child over their performance on the soccer field?

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Offside confuses soccer parents - there is no denying it. I chuckle because I see some soccer parents who played AND have coached, yelling at referees for offside when it clearly wasn’t. So how would you explain offside to soccer parents? Josh at Throughball found a soccer parent asking that very question though he’s not admitting how! Anne from My Tiny Kingdom asked for her readers help:

None of the Glamores knows a thing about soccer, except that I am aware of the hotness of the aforementioned David Beckham, which I have witnessed first-hand, and his alleged talent, which I have not.

At the game yesterday the referee kept calling “off-sides” and I thought that meant that the ball rolled out of bounds and had to be thrown in by the other team. Sadly, I soon learned that this innocuous term has a complicated meaning having to do with where people are when someone kicks at the goal. I think.

At dinner last night we ascertained that no member of our family, including Finn, understands the “off-sides” rule.

I always seem to go into WAY too much detail hoping some of it will sink in, even if all of it doesn’t. The comments that Anne got were generally helpful, and a few pretty funny, but I still didn’t see a good summary of understanding offside for soccer parents. So share em if you got em!

I’ll admit I spend more time coaching and watching youth soccer live in person than watching professional/international soccer on FSC, so these commercials are likely old news to many of you. But they made me laugh out loud so I figured I’d share them for those of you who haven’t seen them yet. Hilarious yet sadly true…

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I would never advocate heckling a referee, but this is funny:

NFHS game a couple of years ago. Game going well, decent crowd, nothing really unusual. Crowd is relatively loud, but it’s just all background noise. Until, all of a sudden, a hush falls over the stadium and you hear this one loud voice from the far side: “Hey, Ref, I have your cell phone right here. I know it’s yours ’cause there a bunch of missed calls on it.”

Now THAT’s funny. H/T FirstTouch @ NC Soccer Forums

ADDING: HAHAHA From someone commenting on the thread: “I worked with a ref who said that if either coach said that to him (call it both ways ref!), on the next ball out of play he was going to raise both arms and point in both directions for the throw-in. He would explain that was just calling it both ways.”

I wrote a while back about a soccer league that had been severely penalized by the IRS for improperly classifying youth soccer coaches as independent contractors instead of as employees:

For the past two years, the association has been grappling with an I.R.S. audit that found the association failed to withhold taxes for a dozen paid coaches and scores of referees in 2003 and 2004. The I.R.S. assessed the association $334,441 in back taxes and fines

The Fairfield case - which centers on a dispute over whether coaches and referees are employees or, as the league contends, independent contractors - is not the first time the I.R.S. has fined a nonprofit youth sports league. But the penalty is one of the largest, and it has sent worried sports officials from Connecticut and other states scrambling to review the finer points of the tax code.

This was a huge issue since almost all youth soccer leagues pay their referees and coaches this way. It would have placed a significant administrative burden on youth sports leagues, especially smaller ones who couldn’t afford to pay CPAs to handle everything.

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As you all know, NC finally eliminated offside for U10 play at the Challenge (travel) level. One of the unanswered questions after this decision was made was what the tournaments would do as they weren’t affected by the decision. One of the bigger regional preseason tournaments in Winston-Salem, that used to be Classic only, added Challenge divisions this year. Their rules stated they would abide by current NCYSA Challenge rules, which for U10 meant no offside and one referee.

That lasted about three hours…

My daughter’s first match was interesting. Neither team was blatantly cherry picking, but the girls realized they could stay a few steps ahead of the defense and receive a pass on the run so they were 1v1 with the keeper. It wasn’t pretty and the score was really lopsided. Then at their second match a few hours later, suddenly the referee was calling offside. Parents on both sides were yelling ‘Its U10! There’s no offside!’ At halftime one of our parents, who is a referee himself, chatted with the referee and asked what was up. He told him that so many early U10 matches had so much cherry picking going on and scores that were really lopsided, they had decided to start enforcing offside. Which was funny because the hosting soccer league was one that had voted to eliminate offside at U10, though it’s not clear if the decision came from the tournament committee or the referee assignor. But it still made many of us laugh. The referee said his colleagues had talked after the first round of matches and that some teams had cherry picked badly while others were pushing up far enough to leave defenders in their wake and go 1v1 with the keeper. So intentional cherry picking or not, it was causing problems. It wasn’t just coaches ‘coaching to win’. Our team’s coach never encouraged the girls to hang by the goal, but the girls figured it out in a hurry what they could now do and took advantage of it. If this tournament was any indication, the U10 season is going to be ugly. Here are the scores from both U10 girls and boys matches at 8AM or 9:30AM before they started to enforce offside: 7-5 13-2 5-2 9-0 10-0. It hadn’t struck me until I saw it happen that the lack of offside was likely to make many matches more lopsided than they would be if offside were called. With mismatched teams, the stronger team can play aggressive defense and leave the cherry pickers unmarked. The weaker team can’t and will suffer more for it.

Needless to say, this turn of events led to yet another epic offside thread on the NC Soccer Forums This time I started it - I couldn’t help myself.

Best parent/player moment of the tournament I was at this weekend? I’m watching a hard fought U11 Girls Challenge match. Scoping out the competition for my own U11 team since most of the teams at the tournament are in our league. The game was VERY close and the parents were getting louder and louder. Some cheering, some not cheering - you know how it goes. One Dad, who wasn’t being ugly, but was yelling at his daughter, said something to her. She turns and stares daggers at him and points at him then to the ground. Her message was clear: SIT!

The Dad was like “OK, I’ll quiet down..” she shook her head, continued glaring, and pointed downward again. Sure enough - the Dad sat down and was a whole lot quieter for the rest of the match.

I almost laughed out loud. I think I’ll be sharing that trick with my girls as well. Parents bugging you from the sidelines? Point at them to sit.

Priceless.

So we’re out at a tournament this weekend - #2’s first real matches with her Challenge team. The girls are wearing their new uniforms and having a ball. #3 (he’s 4 yrs old) is being spoiled rotten by one of the soccer mom’s on the sideline when he asks “Did everyone on the team go to New Jersey?” See - his older brother and sister had gone to New Jersey a few weeks ago to visit their grandparents by themselves. The soccer mom reminded him - “No, only your brother and sister went.” His reply?

“Well then why does everyone on the team have new jerseys?”

I swear - you can’t make this stuff up.

I guess it hasn’t really sunk in yet, even though I was there at tryouts, was there when she found out she made the team, and have taken her to practice these last few weeks. But only now, the night before her first match, is it really sinking in that my only daughter, Soccer Dad’s little girl, is playing Challenge soccer now. She’s headed out to the Twin City Classic for a little preseason warmup action. At 8AM. Saturday AND Sunday. How lucky is that? Can I shoot the match scheduler now, even if just to wound? If you happen to be at the TCC, I’ll be easy to recognize. Just look for the guy with an espresso IV … in both arms.

This will definitely be a developing year as her U10 team is mostly U9s (as is she) with only 3 true U10 players on it. But she’s very excited, has friends on the team she’s grown up playing with, and hopefully will learn a lot in preparation for her real U10 year. She was like a kid at Christmas when she got her uniform today. I’ll admit I had fun with the window chalk, painting her name for once instead of her brother’s.

So good luck princess. Your Soccer Dad is so proud. Have fun, be safe, play hard, and enjoy.

Old Soccer Guy has some thoughts up on why some soccer parents act the way they do. I think he’s definitely hit on a few of the more common ones, though I think there are dozens, if not hundreds, of other reasons out there too:

there is an abundance of moms who had some opportunities but did [ed: not?] work hard enough for them. And they are just now figuring that out. Those are the scary moms. For whatever reasons — usually cultural circumstances that involve their own parents — they bowed to the social stigma surrounding girls and sports in their era. They may have been a tremendous athlete, but didn’t pursue it because girls didn’t do that.

Listen to Julie Foudy, Mia Hamm and Kristine Lilly for a bit and they will use the same phrase — “No one ever told me I couldn’t do something because I was a girl.” That’s the important message, not “Don’t make the same mistake I made, we paid for that personal trainer so you need to work harder.”

His section on Soccer Dads is even more fun. Be sure to read the whole thing.

I’ve found some of the more intense soccer parents are actually those that played soccer in high school and college. Yet Soccer Mom, well known to be an, er, overly enthusiast cheerleader on the sidelines, played no sports at all and says she never aspired to when she was younger (except for cheerleading). Soccer sidelines are a cornucopia of personalities! What are some of the more unique soccer parent personalities you have encountered. Why do you think they are the way they are? Armchair psychologists unite!

The USSF has released their annual advice to referees related to rule changes enacted buy the International Football Association Board (IFAB) in March. One change in particular will have a major affect on youth soccer parents, especially those who play on travel teams where rules like these are usually stringently enforced:

Law 4 - The Players Equipment

Basic Equipment

Present Text

• a jersey or shirt
• shorts - if thermal undershorts are worn, they are of the same main color as the shorts.

New Text

• a jersey or shirt - if undergarments are worn, the color of the sleeve should be the same main color as the sleeve of the jersey or shirt.
• shorts - if undershorts are worn, they are of the same main color as the shorts.

USSF Advice to Referees: The general purpose of this change is to ensure that the visible color of any portion of a garment worn underneath the jersey or shorts is consistent with the main color of the jersey or shorts. Accordingly, the referee need not be concerned about the color or any portion of an undergarment which cannot be seen.

What this means is that white long sleeve Under Armour shirt can’t be worn under a color soccer jersey any longer when the temperatures drop. The exposed long sleeves have to match the jersey color. This presents a bit of a problem for players and parents alike.

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North Carolina finally gave in to peer pressure and joined the rest of the country in prohibiting the enforcement of offside in U10 travel soccer (Challenge). I know this is old news for those of you in NC, but I felt it was still worth sharing for everyone else. Longtime readers know that I’ve talked about this issue in depth a few times before:

• U10: To Call Offside Or Not
• Should Offside Be Called For U10 Small Side?
• U10: Teach The Kids Right - Keep Offside

The meeting to discuss this was interesting. The state brought out the big guns, including Dr. John Thomas, Asst Director of Coaching Education for the USYSA, who was in town helping teach a National Youth License course. They advocated strongly for the elimination of offside in a way that made you feel like we would be destroying kids if we kept it. It was odd, because when questioned, we never got a direct answer as to why calling offside at U10 was such a bad thing. Probably the most articulate response was from a very experienced coach and DOC here in central North Carolina. In his view, offside was allowing teams to push their defense up to midfield too easily and taking away open space because you had 10 players crammed into half the field most of the time. The hope was that without offside, the defense would be less likely to push up so aggressively, opening up the field for more passing, etc. Yet when cherry picking was brought up as a major concern, the national folks argued that teams should ignore the cherry picker, gaining a player advantage - i.e. continue to push your defense to midfield. So we eliminated offside to open up the field, though if teams cherry pick we should pack it into half the field anyway and gain a one player advantage. Huh?

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I admit that I missed the Superliga semifinal between the L.A. Galaxy and D.C. United last night. I hate that - got busy with other stuff. I’ve also stayed out of the Beckham fray for the most part. I think it’s great he’s playing in the MLS and if you set aside all the hype, I think it’ll help the MLS and it should definitely help the Galaxy. But I didn’t see the need to go on and on about it - he’s here, he was hurt, he rested to recover, and now he’s ready to play. Game on! Yet his injury had many people wondering if he’d deliver. Well if last night was any indication, he will. Could the MLS have written a script any better than to have Beckham’s first MLS goal come in his first start on a free kick bent into the left side while the keeper went right from 25 yards out?

Plus he adds an assist to Donovan to make it 2-0. Many people have said they don’t think the Beckham/Donovan combo would work. If last night was any indication, it’s working quite well. Now let’s see how they do against CF Pachuca…

UPDATE: Josh over at ThroughBall has a number of other videos of Beckham’s big night.

I happened to be browsing through some new soccer blogs over at SoccerBlogs.net, and came across the ultimate motto for youth soccer. Touchline Dad has a son who plays for Crosby Stuart FC. Their motto?

To Enjoy, Not Destroy

Can’t put it any clearer than that! A number of people who stand along the touchline need to remember that…

Regardless of your political views or thoughts on global warming, there’s no denying it’s been hot. Very hot. Here in central North Carolina, the temperature has been below 90 degrees only one day this month (88°F on August 11th). Temperatures exceeded 95°F on 8 out of the past 14 days with temperatures above 100°F for three. The rest of this week we expect high temperatures between 92°F and 101°F. And we’ve had soccer practices going on all month. As I noted earlier this month, we don’t have a hard and fast policy for excessive heat. We leave it up to the discretion of the coaches and parents and stress to the coaches the importance of frequent water breaks and less strenuous practices when the temperatures climb.

One reason we don’t have a more precise policy with thresholds and such is primarily due to the difficulty in measuring the true ‘heat effect’.

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