Chivas has introduced a brilliant plan to sell tickets to its home-opener. Perhaps we should call it the "Free Soft-core Porn Corallary." Their players are crap, but their cheerleaders are muy caliente.
A lot of the hard-core American soccer fans have the sex appeal of a
Level 2 half-orc wizard who lost his 20-sided die. These guys are
really good at drinking beer, screaming obscenities and obsessing over
the minutiae of the pariah of professional sports. Sex machines we are
not. So a little tastefully revealed flesh that will appeal equally to
the 13-year-old youth soccer studs and their dads can’t hurt. "Who
cares if they can’t score when Meola’s at the all-you-can-eat buffet?
They’re giving out ChivaGirls calendars!"
If MLS can move to compete with the Victoria Secret catalogue or the SI
Swimsuit Issue among the 8th-grade set, then that’s a real coup. Talk
about viral marketing. Show a boy a couple of goals, you’ll have his
attention for 90 minutes. Guide a boy through puberty and you’ll have a
fan for life. Bravo, Chivas USA!
/me rolls on the floor laughing. Can’t argue with that logic!
Time for another beer me thinks!